Dream 02.10.20

My brain is screaming at me. No, it’s not pain … it’s more like my soul is screaming at me.

[I remember enough about the early part to give you full detail on the location of everything I set down in the stall when I was using the bathroom in this dream, but it doesn’t relate to anything after.]

We drove by an arcade, and it was FULL. Everyone who wasn’t playing on of the many DDR/PIU/Technomotion machines was waiting in line for it. “We should have gotten the weed,” James said, though I don’t recall anyone ever mentioning weed in the dream. We drive around a suburb town, and I remember mulling over thoughts silently, like I normally do, of asking someone and playing out the entire conversation in my mind, making up a story about how person one would send us to person two, and person two would get angry and run over to person one and beat him up.

We continue driving, and we’re in Chicago now. We’re driving down an unknown street, looking for Broadway. I don’t know why, but James mentions Pemberville Road, so we start looking for that. We pass Madison without even wondering why we did when we’re on an E/W street, which would be parallel to Madison.

There was steep hill in front of us, over which I could see the lake. “He’d better slow down,” I think, “The lake is really close to the edge.” We start going down the hill, and the car speeds up. I don’t know if it was from James stepping on the gas, or from the brakes going out, but it happened, and we went straight into the lake.

The car went further underwater, faster than I would expect it to. I could feel the pressure on my chest from the water crushing us. I remember thinking, “Finally, I can learn what its like to die. No more speculation, this is it.” I closed my eyes, and heard James scream, “I’m ready to die!” How could I hear him scream, we were underwater . . . I grabbed his hand, and said, “I love you James. I want to spend eternity with you.” How could I have grabbed his hand, the water has crushed us . . . I reach over and unfasten my seatbelt. I can’t see anything anymore, just a reddish blur in the inside of his car. I push open the door, or I think I do, and leave the car.

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