Art by Meddygon
Tag Archives: roommates
Maria
Maria isn’t here, and her bed is made. Since she is always home when it’s this late, and she never makes her bed unless she’s going home, it’s safe to assume I most likely won’t see her until next week. … Continue reading
Maria
A half hour ago, Maria came into the room to start getting ready. Of course, I woke, but I did not get up. I sat in my bed and watched through half-closed eyes as she opened and slammed the closet … Continue reading
A Call to the Land Lord
I just got off the phone with Kurt, the landlord of our nice little shithell apartment. I had called because of Maria. Just under a week ago, Maria accidentally broke Ashley’s baking stone, an expensive piece of cookware. An honest … Continue reading
Maria
Five minutes after she and I were discussing something, she goes on about it again. After about two minutes of listening to her talk rather loudly about the girl in the next room, I say to her, “Okay, we stopped … Continue reading
Lametria
Grand. Someone just called for Lametria Scott. “She doesn’t live here anymore.” Which is true. So no one should be calling her here, ever. Right? Well, she’s been using my phone without me knowing, as Maria told me a while … Continue reading
Maria
It’s funny how, whenever I say something to Maria along the lines of, “You shouldn’t skip school,” or “You shouldn’t waste your money on taxis,” she always says, “Hahha, you sound just like my mother.” Mom’s can’t possibly have good … Continue reading
More Maria
She said she was going to bed twelve minutes ago. She talked for ten. She’s finally turned off the light. Now she’s muttering to herself VERY LOUDLY. “oh gawd, it’s so hawt” etc.
Maria
Maria just came into our room to tell me that she heard Ashely making noises, and assumes she was masturbating. Maria described it first at “choking and gagging noises” so I assumed Ashley was puking. Then Maria said, “No, it … Continue reading
Maria & Donuts
So she eats a donut without asking. I ask her to not—I wish she’d shut up so I can fucking concentrate on what I’m typing—I ask her to not do it again. She says I’m overreacting, it’s just a donut. … Continue reading
Maria
I’m only up right now because Maria doesn’t know how to quietly open and close doors.
Maria & Calling Mommy
Well, Maria’s back here. She went straight home from school because she wanted money, or so she says. She called her parents to pick her up from downtown. I bet she just got lost/confused.
Maria & Public Transit
Just thought I should mention that Maria and I were late for class yesterday because she spent 45 minutes on her hair. She and I had class at the same time, so I figured I’d teach her how to use … Continue reading
More Maria
Maria: (insert long one-sided conversation about nothing in particular in which she repeats herself five or so times) “… haha, you’re so funny, you’re like, ‘Ah! Our school’ and you hide behind the door, haha, the commercial for our school … Continue reading
Maria
I often wonder how much, if at all, Maria thinks before she speaks; or does she prefer to narrate her process of incorrectly generalizing what she’s just heard?
Maria
Maria just got back from her weekend trip to her parent’s house. First thing she asks me to do is rat our anything Ashley said to me about her. I told her to leave me alone. She was shocked. She … Continue reading
Roommates
I don’t want to deal with either one of them, but only one of them respects my wish to be left out of it. The other keeps trying to drag me into it. — I moved to Chicago because I … Continue reading
Jessica
My current answering machine message: “How are you gentlemen – All your message are belong to us. This an answering machine, not answering service. If you are calling for anyone other than Amanda, Ashley, or Maria, please hang up now. … Continue reading
Maria
“You’re my witness,” she says to me, and grabs my forearm. I yank it back and say, “No.” She looks at me, confused. “I didn’t see anything. I wasn’t there for any of it. I’m not part of this, do … Continue reading
Ashley vs. Maria 2
More on the roommate situation: I was wrong about Maria trying to fight with Ashely. What had happened was Anna, a friend of Ashley’s, came over and tried to fight with Maria. I could hear most of the conversation, and, … Continue reading
Maria’s Guest
Maria asks me if Ashley’s mad at her. I tell her I don’t know. She then asks if I have any idea what could make her mad. I mention the beer bottles that have been sitting there all weekend. “They … Continue reading
Maria & CTA
She knocks on the door and exclaims that she’s in a “fucking hurry,” then adds seven more unneeded sentences. She won’t shut up. I finally say, “Are you going to stop talking for a second so I can answer?” “Well, … Continue reading
Maria
Well, that was interesting. She walks into my room. “Are you up now? I didn’t mean to wake you up. Oh! So how was the party or whatever with your boyfriend? Good, blah? Huh? What? Are you awake? Are you … Continue reading
Maria & Phone Bills
I just took the batteries out of the cordless phone because Maria keeps using my phone. She hasn’t paid her share of the phone bill, and she doesn’t plan to be here long enough to. And she’s been making long … Continue reading
Maria & Sick People
[01:45] [Ettin> Please talk to me. I’m lonely. [04:04] [Schroe[Sheepies]> You’re lucky. I’m going to fucking puke soon, so I’m wide awake. Not only that, Maria knocked loudly on my door a while ago for no fucking reason, and didn’t … Continue reading